Dear reader, I am happy you’re here at this moment.
I’m sure you have a family member, friend, colleague, or even your spouse somewhere outside your home country, working, schooling, on a holiday, or relocated for all the reasons they could have. It’s a good thing. Also for many, it’s an achievement.
I don’t know what took that loved one overseas and I am equally positive I don’t have any idea what agreement you might have had with that person but cut them some slack.
They don’t owe you anything with all due respect. Stop feeling entitled!
I have been travelling around for a while, heard and experienced real life abroad and it isn’t always child’s play.
The other day, I visited a friend in New Jersey from New York. I got to her house mad at how I missed one stop on the train and had to top up my card with 20 more dollars to get on another train and a bus before arriving.
She had her problems too, she said I should quit complaining about my own mistakes and take responsibility for my actions.
Now that was not the welcome I was expecting. She exclaimed that “every day my family had to blame me for everything.”
“I pay the bills, pay my aunt’s daughter’s fees, pay for my parent’s upkeep, and guess what, I cannot seem to find a man I can trust!” She told me. I said, “slow down, how do I come in here?”
They are your family and you’re supposed to take care of them.
She looked sternly at me and said, “all I’m asking for is for my family to understand it’s not all rosy out here, Becky. I work three Jobs, and I even barely have time to take care of myself. I have an office job, cleaning, and a grocery store job which requires me to go there at night and restock the shelves. It’s not a problem Becky because I am dedicated and I know this will be over soon, but when?”
“Can you believe my brother in Ghana has, for two years, been spending the hard-earned money I have been sending for my building project back home? I noticed after two years there was no land, no building, nothing!”
“I am tired! It’s very draining, there are so many expectations of a lot of us in the diaspora and it’s snatching the life out of most people slowly. Becks, how do I explain to my family that I had to stay on my feet for 13 hours before getting a few dollars? Don’t even get me started on gas bills, water, car, taxes, and food.
“We work very hard! Please, put some respect on our monies when we hand them to you for various reasons.”
All I said was okay, “I’m sorry you had to go through all that. I know is hard. Working in the cold, standing or even seating for long hours, taking care of the aged or even being a janitor is hard and we must cut you some slack.”
Essentially, when someone from the Diaspora sends you money for anything, be grateful because they are giving you their time and to an extent, their life.
If you are chosen to take care of someone’s business or project back home, please do well to be, at least, faithful in all your dealings. It’s very important. I can go on and on but I have to figure out how to calm my friend down.
Please share your experiences with me, maybe your story might inspire her to keep going hard.
But for now, she’s also telling me about some relationships ‘wahala’. It’s about her husband, who left her after they both got to America.
My next article will be revealing. Do make time to share your thoughts with me.
The author, Rebecca Tweneboah Darko (Becky), is an entertainment journalist with The Multimedia Group. The views expressed in the article are those of her own and do not reflect the sentiment of the institution.
Facebook: Becky GH
Instagram: @iambecky23
Twitter: @iambecky23
E-mail Rebecca.darko@myjoyonline.com
